Tuesday, November 25, 2008

internet = procrastination

I used to have to watch tv or talk on the phone and procrastinate. Now I can shove chocolate and diet dr.pepper in my face and surf the internet and type on this blog...I love it.
I mentioned that we had pictures on Sunday. The photographer goes to our church and we see her occasionally at church. There are other people we see at church much more regularly....for instance Lilianna's teacher at Sunday school. We see her almost every week. What do these people have in common you might ask. Both of them thought that we had adopted Benjamin.

One of the reasons we had decided to adopt from kyrgyzstan again is because we thought it would be nice to have another child who could share some of the same experiences of Z...a brother or sister who looked like him and came from his country....whether that is right or wrong...I really don't know. Anyway, then we were referred Aaron who is ethnically Russian. In my mind, when we accepted Aaron's referral, I made the assumption that because he is white like us, his adoption would be less apparent than Zeb's. Obviously, when people see my family out, it is clear to see that Zeb looks different and the obvious conclusion is that he is adopted. What I didn't realize is that really....when people see my family out....the conclusion that they make is that all of my children are adopted. I don't mind this in any way nor am I complaining....but it just recently dawned on me. I can't tell you how many times I have been asked what part of Russia Lilianna is from. Benjamin, however, is assumed to be a newborn domestice adoptee because he is so young and the question I get is how old was he when we got him. The irony for me with Benjamin is that I was clearly pregnant and I know these people saw me pregnant...all summer long in my Gap maternity tank tops. I suppose if I had lost more babyweight in the last 5 months it would help delineate the pregnant/not pregnant versions of me but what's a girl to do - especially with so much Halloween candy around!?

I am digressing...but my point is that transracial adoption has had some interesting implications that I totally did not expect.....oh yeah and that I was not just fat for the last year...I was pregnant.

2 comments:

Tapsalteerie said...

People think Sophie's adopted too... they then try to console me on the fact that she's "atypical" (which is nice way of saying crazy weird) but when I say she's bio they get all embarressed looking and shuffle off awkwardly (sorry... rough day at the behavioralist).

Conversely if I'm out with just Beckett then people think my husband's Asian. Seriously! I've had more people ask where my husband's from than if Beckett's adopted... weird!

Michelle said...

That's funny! Noone ever approaches me about anything when I am out alone with Zeb...I have never had any reason to think that anyone has assumed my husband is Asian. I have heard from others that people have made the asian spouse comment though.

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