Thursday, December 31, 2009

New Years Eve

I was reminded by another bloggers post...that this blog is kind of like my journal or diary. I do like to go back and see what I was doing and what mundane things were happening in my life. Lately, I really haven't just rambled on about things....ok...maybe I have...no comments from the peanut gallery!

Today is New Year's Eve. 2010 is going to be a super amazing year. 2009 seems kind of like it was a placeholder...you know the book in a series that is all fluff and nothing really happens. 2006 i finished medical school , 2007 Zeb came home and Keith and I got married, 2008 we had Ben, 2009 we ummmm...got fat. Yes....2009 was the year to eat too much and become what i like to call "hammy". Seriously, my clothing size has doubled from right after I had Ben until now....no excuse except I do love to eat junk and now I am old and my metabolism finally realized it....darn you. I am digressing because getting fat does not make 2009 a substantial year - it just makes me a more substantial person!

2010 though....this is going to be a big year. I finish my residency in June and will start my real job in July which will mean a lot more money and lot more time with my family. I pray that the girls will be home in 2010. I have to believe they will be and that is really exciting.

By this time next year Benjamin will be talking up a storm and we will know what is going on inside his great big head and I think it is going to be good stuff. He is mischevious, far more mischeivious then the other kids. He will also become a raging 2 year old this year....although I do suspect he will be more low key and mischevious. Where Zeb was a screamer and tantrum thrower...I think Ben will quietly spread toothpaste all over the bathroom floor, stick things in his ear, eat coins, and sneak out of the house in the middle of the night. At least, that is what I am preparing for!

Zeb will be 4....that is the age that marks ascension into big-kidness for me. Although, don't get me wrong, when Zeb clawed his way out of the terrible twos that was a great big important age too! Whoa was Zeb a terror tot....however, he had nothing on lilianna the Queen of the terror tots!

Lilianna will be in Second grade. Wow. Now is probably not the time for me to write about her because I miss her so much. She has been at her father's house for about a week. She will be home on Saturday and we will redo Christmas and open some more presents. Next Christmas we will have all the kids and it will be sooo much fun. But back to Lilianna....The older you get the less things change in one year I suppose. She is so full of love for her brothers and so sweet to them. She is also soooo excited to have sisters. Hopefully her gentle heart doesn't get hurt by the attachement process....it is easy for me to read about and understand when things are hard in the attachment process of an older child's adoption, but I think it will be hard for a 7 year old who has been looking forward to loving an older sister.

O is a decade old right now and will be in 5th grade next year. The way he mimics his dad is so wonderfull. The main reason i think that is because I think his dad is so wonderfull! He says things his dad says even though he has no idea what it means...come to think of it I sometimes don't know what his dad is saying! haha. He is starting to become a little teenager....complaining when Zeb messes up his stuff....but still loves his brothers and sister so much. And boy does Zeb love O...we all walked over to pick up the boys at Ms Dee's house and Zeb ran by both Keith and myself to give O a hug. People talk about when you send your kids off to college you just have to let them go and hope that you have raised them to make good decisions. I already know that we can trust O to make the right decisions. Yeah....I know he will make some bad ones with cars and girls...but what boy doesn't!

By the end of 2010 our lives will look so different and yet still be the same...I joke that I fear change. Usually it has to do with what I am ordering at a restaraunt (hey I find something I like I don't want to mess it up!). You have to change to grow and you have to be willing to put yourself out there and take some risks. Maybe instead of making a list of new year's resolutions that I won't keep...I should make a list of risks I am going to take this year. Not things like bungee jumping...but other more personal risks. Things like:
1. reconcile with my sister.
2. Be more vocal about my relatively new found faith
3. Just go on a small mission trip - I have been all talk on that one for years

I might try to think of some more.....I just came up with this risk idea while I was typing so I need to take a nice long bath (with choc chip cookie dough) and think about it!

There is no growth in comfort how bout joining me in taking risks for 2010....what risks will you take this new year?

1 comment:

Tapsalteerie said...

Interesting that you mentioned 2009 as a "placeholder year" as I've felt that way towards it pretty much all year. Having two of my beloved mares die (one in Feb, one in Dec) didn't help my views on 2009 either.

2010 is a big year of change for us... Jim will (hopefully) be out of school (finally) and I'm not sure how that's actually going to effect the whole family dynamic as he's pretty much been in school on and off for the last 10 years. I'm not sure we'll know what to do with him actually being at home and not off at school!

I like the idea of having a list of risks rather than resolutions. I don't really get into the whole resolutions thing, but stating risks... that's doable.

Karyn Purvis Insights and Gifts - sharing power