Friday, June 11, 2010

Complaining...complaining...

It seems like the only I think I do on this blog anymore is complain....I feel like that is all I have done all week. I am remembering what it is like to be an angst ridden teen all over again. I have no real good reason to be so aggravated. I mean I have a lot of little reasons....

but nothing to really explain how ridiculously angry I am at the world right now. Mostly work has been hugely annoying....not as bad as it could be but annoying. I have worked greater than 12 hours every day except today starting around 5am. Granted in residency there have been months..even entire years where I expected and happily (or at least unangrily) plodded along working 80 - 100 hours a week. I even knew that the likelihood of being hosed repeatedly on this rotation was high...so I have come into this rotation knowing that there was a possibility I could be working 12 hour days or longer. So even though work is annoying it can not possibly be the only culprit for my anger.

I did get out of work early today. My case ended at 1145 this morning and I was so excited about heading over to Taziki's for the friday special...which is super delish...and I get a page that we had teaching rounds...so now not only do I not get to go eat lunch at Taziki's...I don't get a freaking lunch at all. I get to go look like an idiot in front of my peers when I unwittingly sit in the hot seat. So I am sleep deprived, starving and the focus of rapid fire questions from our attending. Seriously!

So when I finally got out of there I just headed home..starving (which probably explains all of the random crap I bought at walmart on the way home). Half way home I was so overcome with anger that I just started screaming. Contrary to popular belief that whole primal scream thing is really not that helpful.

I really can't figure out why I am so worked up...I know a big part of it is work, but I think I also miss the pink haired firecracker, Lilianna. I don't feel anxious about the move and I feel totally at peace with the waiting going on for Alex and Zoe right now. Seriously, as far as stress levels go...they are waaaaay down. But something is doing a number on me this week. I know... it must be time for looooong introspective bath with chocolate chip cookie dough and loud music.

In good Kyrgyzstan news......I just found out today that our postplacements for Zeb are now only for 3 years instead of 14 years so we have our last one due in August and that is it for post placements. I had no idea and I am sooo excited about it. I mean really, writing up a post placement every 6 months is not that arduous..but it is one less thing I have to remember to do. So it is pretty cool!

2 comments:

Shannon said...

Sometimes, you just have to be pissed and you don't need a reason. Scream, bathe, eat ice cream and wait it out. I hear you on the post placements - we just did our last one - hooray!

walshalex61 said...

Cast not the first stone. ........................................

Karyn Purvis Insights and Gifts - sharing power